Live Your Life Well

This is an entry written by a nurse who have worked in terminal care for several years. It lists down the top 5 greatest regret patients have before dying.

From: http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.


2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.


3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.


Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

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1) Yea, we often live our lives under the shadow of other people's expectations. We do what others think it's right to do. Do we really have the choice to choose the path we like? Or are we merely forced by circumstances to follow a predetermined path? Sometimes we have a choice, but claim that there's not, and we are actually just adhering to what others think.

2) People work very hard all their lives to earn lots of money, and end up not being to spend them on the things they enjoy. We work hard for personal achievement, striving for excellence in whatever we do. But there is much more to life beyond all these.

3) We always have things that we can't say, don't feel it's right to say, or simply don't feel like saying. We are afraid of the reactions of others. However things might turn out better than expected. This is usually a gamble, which can make or break.

4) As we get older and set up a family or start a career, we will tend to focus our time on them. Friendships start to weaken, and by the time the friends around us are gone, we'll realise how much we've lost. Like the old saying goes: hard to make, easy to break

5) To what extent can you say that you're happy? Sometimes we might not even know ourselves. It's uncontrollable, unmeasurable and unpredictable. Let's not forget human's desire is endless. Something that made us happy the first time may not make us happy the next time. Can we ever reach a state of complete satisfaction?